This post was originally published on May 22, 2015 by Kathy Escobar on her blog and printed in full below with her permission. Kathy is co-pastor of The Refuge, a faith community in North Denver. She describes herself as most passionate about community, the marginalized, healing, spiritual transformation, equality, justice, “church”, relationships, diversity, and learning to love and be loved. You may link to her blog here.
Yesterday I had the privilege of sharing on a panel alongside 4 other female pastors & leaders in a room filled with about 25 male pastors & leaders in Denver. Most everyone had evangelical roots, and while some pastored churches others were leading nonprofits and various ministries in town.
There was only one purpose: to listen to what it was like to be a woman in ministry.
We had told our stories several months before in a similar forum, but last time the number of women listening far outweighed the number of men. This time around, it was specifically for men and some dear friends worked extra hard to invite men to be part.
I admit, I was a little edgy on the way there. It is so vulnerable to share our real stories, not knowing what the consequences might be. Even though I’ve been an outspoken advocate for women’s equality for many years, when the conversations are in a more intimate but also professional setting, there’s more at risk.
The thing that kept me going was remembering change won’t happen unless we are willing to risk, to rock boats, to ruffle feathers, to disturb the status quo. Yeah, Well behaved women won’t change the church.
And it always seems like the way toward something new together comes from a weird combination of humility & openness & discomfort & vulnerability for everyone involved.
While the agenda wasn’t beyond listening, it was clear there was a desire for a lot of the men attending to learn how to become better advocates for women’s equality.
What does that tangibly look like? What helps heal the divide between men and women in the church? How can men better participate in healing the deep grooves of patriarchy? How can we become equals, true equals? Continue Reading »