Women, Race, and the Problem of Anger

As part of my doctoral research, I interviewed several young women about identity and ministry. The interviews happened to be taking place as Hilary Clinton was running for president. One of the women in the group confessed that she did not think Hilary would make a good president, because she would probably be too emotional when crisis situations occurred. This was a strong young woman who considered herself a feminist, but she couldn’t imagine a woman president getting angry in a way that would serve her well as a leader.

I always find it interesting that we assume that men act rationally in crisis situations, with logic and without emotion. The truth is, however, that men express a lot of emotions in leadership, but when they express anger it is seen as strength, as righteous indignation, as appropriate aggression or self-defense.

Many decades ago a woman named Jean Baker Miller wrote a short article entitled “The Construction of Anger in Men and Women.” (The article can be found in the book Women’s Growth in Connection: Writings from the Stone Center.) It described the fear often associated with anger expressed by women. Miller suggests that “the profound cultural fear of women’s anger is probably connected to the fact that women have been the main ‘caretakers’… We have a culture that is not organized so that members of the dominant group really take care of each other.”

More importantly, her work talked about how anger is constructed in our society. How those in dominant positions are trained to express anger as competition and aggression. How those without power are trained not to express anger. How the anger of those without power is often exaggerated, suppressed, or denied.

I have thought about this concept and this article often over the years. When so many of the pioneering women pastors that I knew were being written off as “angry women.” When women clergy expressed anger about being disrespected by parishioners or harassed by supervisors and were disregarded or written off as being too sensitive. When a community expressed anger over the fatal shooting of a young black man by a white police officer and the media portrayed them as out-of-control and riotous.

The idea that anger is interpreted differently for different people in different situations has caused me to think differently when I feel anger or am confronted by anger either personally or in the media. It has caused me to try to set aside my initial responses of fear or defensive anger and to really listen to others. To not take it personally. To wonder why people are angry before getting upset that their anger seems excessive or overwhelming. To ask if there is any chance that my fear of the truth is keeping me from listening.

Our God would not want us to ignore anger being expressed as a result of injustice. May our desire to act justly and to love mercy outweigh our fear of conflict and our desire for an easy way to peace.