{"id":2643,"date":"2017-04-11T21:58:13","date_gmt":"2017-04-11T21:58:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/?p=2643"},"modified":"2017-04-11T21:58:13","modified_gmt":"2017-04-11T21:58:13","slug":"creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/2017\/04\/11\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\/","title":{"rendered":"How Cr\u00e8me Br\u00fbl\u00e9e Became My Lenten Discipline"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em><a href=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe.jpg\" rel=\"prettyPhoto[2643]\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-2431\" src=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe-300x200.jpg 300w, http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe-1024x682.jpg 1024w, http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe.jpg 2029w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>Ellie VerGowe currently serves as Ministerial Resident for Community Outreach at First\u00a0Covenant Church in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle. She is a singer, an artist, a\u00a0traveler and she is passionate about building relationships and pursuing reconciliation.\u00a0On the many gray evenings in rainy Seattle, you can find Ellie eating good food with\u00a0good people.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>There\u2019s something about growing up woman that makes many of us feel like we need to\u00a0give until we break (and then give some more).<\/p>\n<p>Of course selflessness is all apart of our faith, right? Our God became like a servant\u00a0and became obedient to death&#8230;even death on a cross. We are supposed to love\u00a0others and to give up our lives for our friends! This is scripture, after all. This is the\u00a0example of our Savior.<\/p>\n<p>But this is something that is already a strength of many women from our social\u00a0conditioning&#8230;from watching the matriarchs of our family and from watching the\u00a0servanthood of the women at church. This is something most women already know how<\/p>\n<p>to do. It is embedded in our culture and in our hearts.<\/p>\n<p>But while this might seem like a gift, our world teaches women and girls a way of\u00a0selflessness that leaves us empty and wounded. I have found myself over the years\u00a0always saying \u201cyes\u201d to whatever people asked of me wherever I found myself. I\u00a0overworked myself in ministry, working hours over normal work weeks to care for others.\u00a0I thought I needed to please others and to give up my rights. While both Christian men\u00a0and women are told that selflessness is a virtue, women are taught this to a higher\u00a0degree and in a different, more painful way. We should always be the ones who load\u00a0and unload the dishwasher in the office kitchen. We should be a listening ear for anyone\u00a0and everyone and give them motherly love. We should sacrifice our thoughts and\u00a0desires for those of the men around us (whether they realize it or not). I accepted early\u00a0on that my job was be quiet and to serve. I know I am not the only one.<\/p>\n<p>And so, when Lent came around one of the years I was in college and people were\u00a0giving things up, I wondered what might be helpful for my relationship with my Creator&#8230;should I give up eating sugar? Or television? Or cafeteria pizza? Or&#8230;?<\/p>\n<p>And what I settled on seems a little ridiculous. While out at a restaurant with some\u00a0friends, I settled on ordering myself a cr\u00e8me br\u00fbl\u00e9e for Lent.<\/p>\n<p>And that isn\u2019t all. I settled on giving up pleasing others for Lent. I decided to give up\u00a0saying \u201cyes\u201d to things and instead take some time to recharge. I chose to do things I\u00a0loved doing. I chose to take time for self care. I chose to thrive, to value myself and\u00a0enjoy things I loved&#8230;things like cr\u00e8me br\u00fbl\u00e9e. I wasn\u2019t lavishing myself with expensive\u00a0things (like cr\u00e8me br\u00fbl\u00e9e sometimes is!) for 40 days&#8230;I was simply choosing to treat\u00a0myself with kindness, allow myself to rest and be me. I chose, most truthfully, to create\u00a0in my rhythm a healthier balance where I followed our savior who both gave up of\u00a0himself out of love for us and who ALSO took time to go off to a quiet place and\u00a0recharge with his friends. This may not be everyone\u2019s needed Lenten discipline for\u00a0further discipleship, but it was mine.<\/p>\n<p>And you know what? Against all odds, it was hard to practice!<\/p>\n<p>You see, my mind told me what I needed to do to be a more balanced human, but years\u00a0of practice and bad theology got in the way. I had grown up believing that selflessness\u00a0meant letting myself be walked over. I grew up thinking God wanted me to be miserable.\u00a0It was hard to not feel guilty as I did things I wanted to do for a change and made my\u00a0own desires known. I felt that, perhaps, God was disappointed in me&#8230;that maybe I\u00a0wasn\u2019t doing enough for the Kingdom.<\/p>\n<p>But as time went on, I began to see that God\u2019s Spirit in me valued me more than I did.\u00a0My desires were not antithetical to God\u2019s. As I have continued this Lenten tradition from\u00a0year to year, I have noticed that it allows me to simply be more human. I am not God. I\u00a0also cannot care for others if I do not care for myself. I can\u2019t give out of cupboards that\u00a0have nothing in them.<\/p>\n<p>It all seems pretty common sense, but women struggle with this most I think. This\u00a0Lenten discipline is about 9 years old in my life now, and I still don\u2019t have it down. Self\u00a0care takes constant work (and it is not only a Lenten discipline!). It will take a long time\u00a0for the pendulum to swing to a balance where I live into the calling of being BOTH\u00a0servant and child of the God. But I am learning that I am not here to be used for other\u2019s\u00a0purposes&#8230;even if they are good. I am here because of and for a God who took time to\u00a0rest. And I am loved by that God! That God has my best in mind! That God is kind to\u00a0me&#8230;can I be kind to myself?<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-report-this\"><a href=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge?moderation_action=report_form&#038;object_type=post&#038;object_id=2643&#038;width=250&#038;height=300\" class=\"thickbox\" title=\"Report This Post\">Report This Post<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ellie VerGowe currently serves as Ministerial Resident for Community Outreach at First\u00a0Covenant Church in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle. She is a singer, an artist, a\u00a0traveler and she is passionate about building relationships and pursuing reconciliation.\u00a0On the many gray evenings in rainy Seattle, you can find Ellie eating good food with\u00a0good people. &nbsp; &nbsp; [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":172,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19328],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2643","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-testimoies-and-stories"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How Cr\u00e8me Br\u00fbl\u00e9e Became My Lenten Discipline - Commission on Biblical Gender Equality<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/2017\/04\/11\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How Cr\u00e8me Br\u00fbl\u00e9e Became My Lenten Discipline - Commission on Biblical Gender Equality\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Ellie VerGowe currently serves as Ministerial Resident for Community Outreach at First\u00a0Covenant Church in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle. She is a singer, an artist, a\u00a0traveler and she is passionate about building relationships and pursuing reconciliation.\u00a0On the many gray evenings in rainy Seattle, you can find Ellie eating good food with\u00a0good people. &nbsp; &nbsp; [&hellip;]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/2017\/04\/11\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Commission on Biblical Gender Equality\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2017-04-11T21:58:13+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blogs.covchurch.org\/bge\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/96\/2016\/08\/Ellie-Vergowe-300x200.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Jan Bros\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Jan Bros\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Jan Bros\",\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/331f951ef34d0c273fe2d8481dc3d6aa\"},\"headline\":\"How Cr\u00e8me Br\u00fbl\u00e9e Became My Lenten Discipline\",\"datePublished\":\"2017-04-11T21:58:13+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":931,\"commentCount\":4,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/96\\\/2016\\\/08\\\/Ellie-Vergowe-300x200.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Testimonies and Stories\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/\",\"url\":\"http:\\\/\\\/blogs.covchurch.org\\\/bge\\\/2017\\\/04\\\/11\\\/creme-brulee-became-lenten-discipline\\\/\",\"name\":\"How Cr\u00e8me Br\u00fbl\u00e9e Became My Lenten Discipline - 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